Mr. This Ain't No Love Shack

This is a story from a date I had recently. Like not-even-a-week-old-yet recent. We're calling him "Mr. This Ain't No Love SHACK" or TANLS for short.

The date begins by a set up from my friend, Mrs. Plano. I never knew being single was awful, until my married friend posted a singles ad for me. Anyways, I talked to TANLS for a week or two. He immediately got some strikes against him. He would cut me off in mid conversation saying "I'm so sorry but I'll have to call you back. I'll call you right back!" and as I sit by the phone and wait..I get nothing. Then about 2am I get a text of "I just got home." He just wasn't a man of his word, and that bothered me. So we finally set up a date. The food was delicious. We went to a hole-in-the-wall Mexican place. You KNOW it's good food when there are nothing but true Hispanics there. The conversation was going quite well, also. The lunch date ends and he informs me that he needs to go to Radio Shack to pick up a part for work. No worries. I'm down. Let's GO! So we're there and Radio Shack is just having some issues. We're standing in line and there are two, obviously irritated, people at the desk trying to check out and get their problems solved. There was also two people in line ahead of us. So we're standing there talking and he decides that he needs to lighten up the situation, I suppose. He yells up to the front desk "Hey! Are y'all hiring by any chance?" The butch-like woman...I think she was a woman...yells back "Yea, we are actually." He, wearing his work clothes that were SO not attractive (speedo-like long sleeve undershirt, too tight t-shirt, and some dressy shorts that the 80s called back home because they were SOOOooo short), points to the logo on his shirt and says "I've actually already have a job..I was just wondering." Well, if that's not awkward. Then he wants to start talking to the other people in line. That would be cool if his comments weren't...um...nuts. He said "What are we doing? Standing in line at a funeral? You are both standing there looking morbid." They look at me and I just wanna be like I JUST MET HIM! Don't judge meeee! Haha. It's now been about 15 minutes of comments like this when it becomes my turn for the humiliation. He looks at me and I'm just standing there. Arms are comfortably folded in a criss-cross fashion. I switch my weight from one foot to the other. Just trying to make it through Radio Shack with Mr. TANLS. He says, very loudly, "What's wrong? You need to go to the bathroom? Why don't you just pee on the floor?" The manager, who is 5 people away says, just as loudly, "Ma'am if you need to use the restroom is right back over there." (Pointing to a corner) I look up and say "I'm fine. Thanks." And look away trying to take the attention off of me. So Mr. TANLS says aloud "No, she just prefers to pee on the floor, thanks." Why me!? I never even mentioned the word "potty". Why would he say this to me? The date finally ends and he tries to call and text me. I just informed him that I was completely embarrassed and didn't feel that was first date material. He proceeds to inform me that I am just too uptight..and that he was NOT another first date horror story. Oh yea...you wanna bet?! Because really...

WHO DOES THAT?!